Monday, September 8, 2008

I've Got A Secret

I've got a dirty little secret, and I am going to share it with everyone. I am a Bridezilla watcher. I never miss an episode and I am glued to the television while it is on. I am embarrassed too, inside I know it's just a trash show, but it's like watching a train wreck about to happen...."Can't - Look - Away!" So, I ask myself, why do we watch these shows, the ones that reveal the ugliest side of people, and what does this show say about marriage. Bridezillas, for those who don't know, is a reality television show on the We Channel, that is dedicated to girls who are planning their wedding and doing so with a monster of a bad attitude, thus the title "Bridezillas." But it goes beyond that, into a realm of just plain rudeness and at some point even abuse, which is directed at anyone who happens upon the bride to be, and no one is immune. I am embarrassed for these young (and not so young) women and even pained for their fiances, and as I watch I ask myself the same question that every other person watching must be asking as well, "Why are you marrying this woman!?" In one episode the groom's attendants all said that they had tried to talk him out of the marriage, but to no avail. Most of these gals are, to be honest, not the most well spoken, educated, or classiest acts around town, and so I have to wonder, where are these boys parents and why aren't they stopping this fiasco, like I would if this were my son. But, of course they couldn't even if they wanted to, just like I couldn't stop my sons if they chose to marry a monster. As you can tell, I have been giving this a lot of thought, and I remembered something I once read about cockroaches, that for the dozen you see there are hundreds more you don't see. If this is true with bugs, then I have to imagine that this is true for Bridezillas too! And as usually happens with me, one thought leads to another and I begin to see why marriages are failing so miserably these days, the proverbial proof is in the pudding. If these Bridezillas act so horrible and ugly during what is supposed to be the happiest time of their lives, how must they act when they have a bad day, or the bills need to be paid, or the laundry has piled up. The sacrament of marriage is in a fast decline, especially for this generation of young women, and I have to wonder, what has my generation taught them that makes them feel so terribly entitled and horribly angry towards everyone, most especially their husbands to be. And, what happens at the end of the day when the camera's are no longer rolling, the wedding venue is closed and the guests have gone home. And what will be the future of these marriages, and more important, what will be the environment of these homes that their future children will be growing up in. I begin to wonder and worry, as a typical earth mother about these things, and then I remember this is just a show and who knows if it's even real and not actors, because honestly can anyone really be that disgusting. My Bobby used to say, "Why would anyone want to air their dirty laundry in public," and I have to wonder what prize awaits these brides at the end of the shows production, a honeymoon perhaps, and is it worth it. And are these women told to be on their worst behavior because the more they terrorize the better the prize or do the producers just not allow them to take their prozac during production. What do they get out of it and more important why do I watch it, because let's be honest, watching it is condoning and even supporting this bad behavior that is contributing to the decline of marriage longevity. And as these deep thoughts and questions swirl within my brain, I am left to wonder, while I wait with anticipation for next week's episode. Someone get me some wedding cake....NOW!


Anonymous said...

I understand this very much. I read a blog that is so not right and I do it because it has gained my interest. It is so hard to break it. I often tell myself, my children, and friends. If God is against it, so am I. But, even though I know he would be against what I am doing, I still do it.

Karyn said...

we are human after all :)

Patricia Miller said...

I honestly think that with a lot of these spoiled brides, it is "Fairy Tale Syndrome". They get to be a princess for a while, but then after that one magical day, they are not prepared for the reality of marriage. No storybook ever tells us of a princess standing in front of a washing machine and scrubbing the skid marks out of Prince Charming's underwear. Real life gets messy and who wants to deal with messes?

I believe in happy, but I also believe there is no such thing as happily ever after. All marriages have ups and downs. The important thing is to always treat one another with respect, and I doubt that is something these bridezillas ever heard of.

Great blog post Karyn!

Jaime said...

I have seen a few episodes, a long time ago. My wedding was so happy for me and I can't imagine my Mother letting me behave the way some of these girls do. I think she would have jerked a knot in my tail right quick! It is sad to me that half of the marriages in this country end in divorce :(

Karyn said...

thanks girls....great comments!

patty...i agree totally...and i love your point..."No storybook ever tells us of a princess standing in front of a washing machine and scrubbing the skid marks out of Prince Charming's underwear. Real life gets messy and who wants to deal with messes?" i couldn't have said it better kid ;)

jaime...i agree totally...and i am appalled at the way the parents are treated....i wouldn't have traded the fun my folks and i had planning my wedding...i was nothing but grateful to them....and i love where you said... "I think she would have jerked a knot in my tail right quick!" loved it my dear.

hugs friends